Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Update.

Hello, friends. Just popping in to give you the latest update-- so much has happened since the last time I posted. It's been a whirlwind of a week. I'm sorry that I haven't been better about updating... We of course by this time have new information concerning my mom, but it's just been SO busy. And I think I've been processing it all, taking the time to think and pray about it all and just take it all in. Taking the time to rejoice in the positive little things and, sometimes, cry about the scary and hard things. Like I said, it's been a total whirlwind. Less than two weeks ago (wow, really?? It seems ages) I had not an inkling of any of this and now our whole lives, our whole perspectives, have shifted and changed rather drastically. I know this is even more the case for my mom, dad, sisters, and little brother, since they are right there in the thick of it. Me, I'm here, many miles away and busy with my "normal" life because that's really all I can do. Even normal life is not the same now though... anyone who's ever had a dear one with a serious illness must know exactly what I mean. It's hard sometimes.

Anyway, allow me to fill you in. As you already know, my mom had her biopsy last Tuesday night. Jeremy and I were so thankful to be able to be there-- it made it so much easier, and we were able to actually enjoy the time before she went in, just spending time as a family, being our normal goofy selves. She then spent most of Wednesday in the ICU, simply because the hospital was so full that they didn't have a room to move her to, but she was really doing quite well and the biopsy went great. We had to head home again on Thursday, and on Friday my mom got to go home, just short of a week spent in the hospital. Since then she's been doing pretty well, feeling ok and just taking it easy. She's learning her limitations, which I'm sure is frustrating sometimes, but she is blessed with wonderful caregivers in my dad and sisters.

Friday was also the day we got the results of the biopsy back. I should tell you, we've been all over the place with what they thought the tumor might be, first one thing and then another, and we'd been told it probably was NOT certain things too. I guess it just goes to show that you never know for sure until those results actually come in. The results told us that it was a lymphoma-- cancer. My mom has cancer. It's honestly quite surreal to type that...

BUT-- but, while that is most certainly not good news, there are some positives, the first one being that we actually know about it and can now treat it. The doctor is very optimistic, and says the prognosis is good. She and my dad are meeting with the oncologist today to discuss treatments and lay out a plan, so I'm anxiously awaiting to hear the outcome of that meeting and what lies ahead. Whatever it may be, I breathe a huge sigh of thankfulness and relief in knowing and trusting beyond a shadow of a doubt that the Lord already knows every outcome and that He will sustain and strengthen my mom every minute of every day.

I won't lie, this has been hard. Really hard. But it's strengthening all of us and refining our faith, bringing us closer together... and even amidst tears, sadness, fear, and whatever other emotion may come (there's a whole plethora of those, believe me), it's still possible to give thanks to our God for so many things.

My sister Lydia was the one who brought my mom home on Friday, since my dad was taking care of prescriptions and such, and she and mom happened to hear this song while in the car after leaving the hospital. She shared it with me, and I was amazed at how perfect it was. I love what my mom put on her facebook after listening to it, and I couldn't say it better myself: "The sweet silver lining is the promises of God to work all things together for our good." Yes!! Amen.


Please continue to keep praying-- it means so much to us all. This could be a long, hard road-- we don't know. We're taking it a step at a time, celebrating the little victories when they come along (Mom, you know what I'm talking about, I won't share them here ;)), and simply trusting. Tomorrow morning Mom has to have further testing done, to make sure there are no lymphomas anywhere else, so she'll be getting a PET scan, a bone marrow biopsy, and a spinal tap. NOT a fun day. I hate to think of it... :( Extra prayer for quick procedures, skillful hands on those administering the tests, a special measure of grace and comfort for my mom, and hopefully small amounts of pain.

I'll leave you with some pictures of our last-minute trip to Denver last week. Because everyone loves pictures! Whee!! (Side note: these are not in chronological order. Also, the lighting in hospital rooms is not conducive to attractive pictures. Hence the black and white on many of these. hehe)

Dad and I on Wednesday, in Mom's swanky new room.
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Mom received some lovely flowers on Tuesday before her biopsy. Of course, we had to banish them to the nurses' station since they bothered her allergies.... but not before we took a picture of them. The title of this shot is "Girl in a Garden". ;)
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Mom was also blessed with a bundle of all sorts of goodies-- just look at all that loot! I especially love the hat and scarf, which are handmade by a woman in South Africa.
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This was LATE Tuesday night, back at the house finally, after the biopsy. I think this picture perfectly sums up how we all felt at that moment. Mostly, just SO TIRED.
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Of course we enjoyed our sister time, even if it was under not-so-perfect circumstances. Love these girls, don't know what I would do without them.
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Speaking of sisters, this one looks awfully confused. Or angry. But doesn't she look cute in that hat?
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My older brother Tyra was able to fly in from Chicago to be there, and he quickly became our resident researcher and obssessive question-asker. He's a good one. And this is one of the only shots I got of Josiah, because the hospital kicked him out later that day. He's under 18. Boo.Photobucket

I snapped this while driving to the hospital in the late afternoon. I love the Denver skyline.
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This picture melts my heart and makes me want to cry all at the same time. (Doesn't my mom look gorgeous? I could never look that good if I'd been in the hospital for days.)
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And this one, well, this one makes me wish I was by her side again to spend time with her and be there for her. Love you, Mama-la.
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22 comments:

Lisa said...

Oh Talia! I cannot even imagine. Or I sort of can because of various family members going through cancer, but not my mom. Praying for you and your family.

Jerusha Abigail said...

This post made me cry. I just love my family so very very much. And you're right, this has been an extremely hard thing. Nothing I ever though I would have to go through. But here we are. We just have to remember that everything, including this, is all in God's hands and all part of His sovereign will. What a blessing to have faith and trust in Him. I don't know what I would do without it. Or without you, sister. It was oh so wonderful to have you!! To spend that little amount of time together being our regular goofy selves but also having your support. I love you, Talia.
xoxo

oh, and thanks for posting that pic of me. lol

Katie said...

Sweet Talia, your post is so inspiring, and heart wrenching at the same time. I'm crying as I type if you must know. I just simply can't imagine typing those words that you had to type. Your family is heavy on my heart and I am praying for you all!

Lauryn said...

I'm so sorry for the stress your family has been going through, but glad that the prognosis is good!

I know we've all been keeping your mom in our thoughts and prayers!

And you look SO much like your mama! Pretty ladies :)

Jenn@the loves of jenn said...

Oh Talia, my heart aches for you friend. I know how hard it must be to be so far away when something like this is going on. I am praying for your mom and your entire family (especially for tomorrow and all of her procedures).

Sunny said...

Oh, I cannot even imagine all of the feelings and emotions you must be going through. We'll continue to pray for your mom, the doctors, and the entire family. I'm so sorry you all have to go through this. I pray God uses it to draw you all closer to Him. Please keep us posted and continue to let us know specific ways we can pray for your mom! I'll be thinking of her as she endures those tests. Hugs! I love you, friend!

molly june. said...

my heart is so heavy for your family, sweet talia. it is so beautiful to see such a close knit family. i pray God knits you even closer as you hold on tight for this crazy ride. that he gives you peace & courage & unity as you face this as a family. & that you continue trusting in Him. love you. so much!

sufferingsummer said...

ok I know the circumstances aren't great but how beautiful is your family! seriously!
My Mom went through cancer last year....not easy but God is so good and I'm so glad it sounds like the prognosis is good. It is a long haul ahead (we are still in it in a lot of ways even though she's been cancer free for almost 6 months)...we will continue to pray for you and your family!
much love.

alyssa said...

Wow what a hard thing to deal with! I am glad you guys found out what was wrong and you can now look towards positive things! I hope your momma feels better soon! :)

. said...

sweet talia........I can't imagine the feelings and emotions rushing through you this last week. i will continue to lift you and your family up in prayer. something like this makes one put life in perspective, and at the same time...makes you realize that God's grace is so sufficient. I am so proud of your amazing attitude. You are a blessing to your family.xoxo

*CPA* Su said...

Oh Talia! There are absolutely NO words that I can say to you right now that will make any of this better. I can just say that I love you and while I don't know your family personally, I love what I know about them and I know that they are SO special to you! Please know that you are all continuing to be in my prayers through all of this.

*BIG HUGS* Friend! <3

Band of Brothers said...

Talia...my dear sweet friend...my heart just aches for you all as you go through all the uncertainties. I marvel at your grace. You have all been on my constant thoughts and prayers. I love you!

lorieloo said...

crying crying for you. but so thankful that YOU KNOW that the Lord is in control. praying with all my might for your family and the struggles ahead. hugs girly, and lots of love.

The Thompson Family said...

What a beautiful family you have! And what an amazing God that He would use this scary time to refine your faith and use you all as witnesses of His love. My heart aches for you and your family because I know that cancer is such a scary diagnosis. Praying for wisdom and strength as your mom undergoes treatment. I just wish you lived closer to your family because I know the distance must be really difficult. :( HUGS!

Lori DeLarm said...

Oh my dear sweet Talia I cant even imagine how you must feel but you know that my arms are hugging you right now and that I love you and your family and I have been praying everyday for your mom but I also know that God is in control and He knows what is going to happen and we have to trust in him that all will come together for his good. I love you and if you need anything please let me know I will try to help in anyway.

Misty said...

Will certainly be praying... What a beautiful example of faith you are being, just expressing such optimism here...

Kayla said...

My dear lovey,
I can't even imagine what you and your family must be going through it's hard enough for me just to read all of this and keep myself under control:(( I will definetly continue to keep you and ALL your family in our prayers back here in Nebraska! WE LOVE YOU ALL! God Is In Control!! :)) Lots of Hugs from ME to you ALL!

.jimaie.marie. said...

listening to that song made me tear up, it's crazy how perfect it is for your mom right now. I think it's amazing the little ways that God reminds us in that still small voice that he IS here with us...one of those things that other people may call a "coincidence" but for others it's exactly what keeps our faith alive.
I am praying, PRAYING for your precious family. The amount of grace you've shown throughout all this is astounding to me b/c I know I would just want to hide in a closet and kick and scream! But it is so comforting that you know that God is in control and what is so very awesome is that even in your times of tribulation you are being an example to US, the ones who are following your story and who love your family, you are helping to remind us of what's important and that God is capable of ANYTHING.
I look at all these pictures and I just want to SQUEEZE your family, cancer SUCKS and I know it seems silly to think that knowing it's cancer is a good thing but I'm so glad that the doctors know what is wrong and are able to move forward with a gameplan.
LOTS AND LOTS of love to you all <3

Lydia said...

I love this post because you're such a comfort. We've talked on the phone about all of this and it's just so great knowing we feel the exact same way and knowing you're always there for me.
Our family is amazing and we're strong. God will guide us through this, just like everything else.
God never lays anything on us that we won't be able to bear and He works all things for our good and in that we can find comfort. We may not know what His plans are right now but we may be assured that in the end we will see His promises fulfilled.
I love you sister!
"For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him;
as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him." Psalm 103

Sarah said...

Talia, You have such a wonderful outlook and fighting spirit going in to this. I can only tell you it will make a world of a difference. Your mom needs that energy and you are giving it right to her.
Thank you for the update I have been thinking of your mom lately and will continue to do so.

Mommy Diffee said...

I have had to wait for the tears to stop before I could type ... but now I do not know what to say. I love you and your family dearly Talia and am praying for Gods amazing grace.
And could that really be Josiah?! I remember him being smaller than your girls are now =)
If you need a coffee break to chat call me dear!

Olive Oyl said...

It's been so long since I've been on blogs and I'm so sorry I missed this... I'm just in tears over here. Praying for you, for your mother, for your family... She is in God's hands and how amazing that you know that with your whole heart. Keep us updated on her condition and progress and PRAISE GOD for his goodness that the cancer was found and that it can hopefully be conquered.

You are in my thoughts and prayers!